top of page
Search

Why You Under-Commit to Your Goals

  • Dec 1, 2025
  • 3 min read

Updated: Dec 4, 2025

I've always loved the quote:

If you don't sacrifice for what you want, what you want becomes the sacrifice.

In the equestrian world, we’re quick to focus on the obvious sacrifices: our time (early mornings, long days) and our money (lessons, vet bills, feed). We accept that these material trade-offs are necessary for progress.


While we often accept the sacrifices of time and money, but the most destructive sacrifices are the mental habits we don't even realise we're making. These are the subtle ways we avoid true commitment in order to protect ourselves from uncomfortable feelings.



The Unconscious Mental 'Sacrifices' You Avoid


Your brain is clever. It knows that high commitment comes with the high risk of disappointment. To manage this fear of failure, it often nudges you toward self-sabotage—habits that limit your effort just enough to give you a built-in excuse if you don't succeed.


Here are two common, hidden ways riders sacrifice their goals for temporary emotional comfort:


1. Avoiding Extension to Avoid Failure


This is the habit of under-extending yourself. You have the skill to attempt that more complex line, ask for that more powerful extension, or commit to that higher fence, but you consistently pull back and settle for "good enough."


The Hidden Reason: If you don't give 100%, you never have to face the real possibility of failing despite your best effort. Not fully extending yourself allows you to tell yourself, "Well, I didn't really try," which is a psychological shield against feeling truly defeated. You sacrifice the opportunity for peak performance to preserve your ego.

1. Set Realistic Goals


Setting achievable goals helps you focus on what you can control. Break down your larger goals into smaller, manageable steps. For example:


  • Short-term Goal: Improve your jumping technique in practice sessions.

  • Long-term Goal: Compete in a specific event by the end of the season.


2. The Habit of Insufficient Preparation


This is the choice to under-prepare for a big goal, like a specific test, show, or clinic - or even underprepare and train your horse! You know you should review the pattern, practice the tricky transitions, or have spent more time on your horse's training, but you "run out of time."

The Hidden Reason: Insufficient preparation acts as a perfect ready-made excuse. When the competition doesn't go well, you can comfort yourself with, "Of course I didn't win; I didn't practice that canter-walk transition enough." You sacrifice the necessary effort for the immediate comfort of having a mental safety net. You prioritise a protective excuse over a challenging commitment.


Choosing Real Effort Over Excuses


The true sacrifice you need to make is giving up the comfort of your excuses. You need to be willing to fully commit, knowing that if you fall short, the feeling will be raw and uncomfortable, with no easy escape route.

The growth zone is only entered when you choose to:


  1. Commit Fully: Decide what full effort looks like—not just for your horse, but for your mental game and preparation.

  2. Face the Outcome: Acknowledge that the feeling of falling short after a full effort will sting, and be willing to feel that sting without resorting to a pre-planned excuse.


Your goals deserve your full commitment. Don't let your fear of failure trick you into sabotaging your own potential.


 
 
bottom of page